Désolé, Non Ménage à Trois

Last Friday was a crisp Autumn evening and I had been looking forward to it because I had Foosball and pool plans with some people. Usually, I like to be a geek this time of year and turn Friday's into "fright-night" Friday's by watching scary movies but being in the apartment alone so much lately got me squirming. Unfortunately, the group dispersed early and I knew some other buddies of mine were down the road at my favorite pub so I drove over.

A dark-haired girl with double-d breasts greeted me as if she knew me and her boyfriend took my jacket and threw it over a stool. I told them that I was looking for someone else but they began to buy me drinks and explain that they were celebrating their divorce finalization that day. They had been married for six-months.

Later, when a buddy found me at the bar a conversation began about how to tell if a marriage is valid. Apparently, the couple was questioning the validity of their "Vegas marriage" to began with. Suspecting that this was going to get even more interesting, I stayed for the free beer but then the dark girl began to come onto me. At first she stated that she had paid for her boob-job, then that the guy had paid for it, then that she had. I won't go into the details but when it became apparent that I wasn't going to cave to her interludes, she and the guy moved on the a younger bar-maid who had just gotten off work.

Again, they began to buy her beer to celebrate their divorce. When the barmaid asked them how long they had been married they then claimed that they had been married six years (as opposed to six months). By then, I had identified it as a swinger scam, secretly informed the bar-maid, and directed one of my buddies to go play a video game with the bar-maid and she happily went along to escape the scam. I continued to drink the free beer and keep an eye on them.

Eventually, they argued and took off together. Next Friday, I'm going back to the fake "fright-night" Friday's at home.