None

my upper thighs ache and burn since i dropped the ninja again over the weekend. i was going to ride and then ended up locking myself out of my apartment. i had no keys for apartment or car, just ninja. i managed to get a ride to where i keep the ninja by a friend but had to walk to her house and got lost. eventually i made it but then my ride was not so pleasant. i was determined to not be discouraged.

for months i have been studying for the next technical certification in my career queue. i failed the first time and have been determined to pass. for the past two weekends and three weeks i have spent most of my spare time studying for this exam. today i not only failed but scored worse than the last one. as i was walking out of the testing center, the desk-lady informed me that they should stop offerring those exams since there is a global failure rate of about 82%. she was right and now i have to take three others to just get this one.

something else bad happened but i can't write about it here as it might impact the divorce proceedings which i have yet to get a consult for because i can't afford it due to the recent thousands i've spent on medical bills that resulted not in a fix but just more pills.

tonight my bed broke. yeah, the new one ... the place where i go to rest at night ...

i'm told that i really need this three-day holiday weekend. i dread it so much that i taste vomit in the back of my throat as it is a glaring reminder of my aloneness ... my sense of nothingness ... the worst might be that i don't even care anymore about how pathetic i sound ... i need someone to take care of the cats