whether or not to worry about the chairs

She says to give up the shame and self-blame -- that I am worrying about the deck chairs when the whole Titanic is going down.

I do not know why some things stick and some do not. Last week she drew a longitudinal diagram of my events. I have to see the whole sum and not just one part.

Pixelated bitmaps swirl within my head and soul in such a tidal wave that there is nothing more I can do for this day but to come home, take my pills, hope for sleep, and hope that if I am awake tomorrow that I can get up and fulfill duties at my job while it lasts.