Within the past week I have realized that I am somehow chasing my separated-husband as I did my own mother.It is a frequent practice within the mental health community to examine the relationship between mother and child.
I do not subscribe to the belief that mothers are to blame for all of their children's problems. Mothers are no doubt a substantial influence - for better or worse or both - but in the end we all must settle our on fate.
Nevertheless, the effects of the mother-child relationship are significant.
I won't go into the horrors of my mother and they do not hold a candle to the kindness of my husband. YET, I find myself chasing my husband as if it were my mother all over again:
"Please pay attention to me!""Please can I matter allot?!""Please be interested in SOMETHING that I am doing. I think I am interesting, why can't you? After all, I have a broad range of interests!"
Damn, why can't I tell the difference anymore? How am I supposed to tell the difference as to whether or not I am serving some sick need or if I am really wanted? How can I even think that I am wanted if nothing about me interests them?
Anyway, is being wanted enough? I guess it depends, again, on what you are wanted for.
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