F5

So it is 1am and I am still waiting. I hit F5, then refresh button, F5, refresh button, F5, refresh button, F5, refresh button, Ctrl-F5, and still nothing from him. I wait and i hope and i cry. Will he fold and give up or will he fight for the relationship. He may have already folded already and I just didn't get the memo.

Odd that today I found myself wearing my wedding ring. I don't even quite know how it happened but when I left work for lunch - there it was on the appointed finger. I did not want to take it off either. F5 ... yeah, still nothing. I have refused to admit that he is lost inside his own war and the only person to get him out is his own self. ...or maybe he doesn't want to.

I'd really like for us to just run away and start over again fresh. I want to go home allot and curl up to the couch as he watches ESPN. It wouldn't take me long to get tired of ESPN. I could handle a longer-term separation so that hopefully I would grow and change and become more accepting of myself so that I can just take him for what he is. It doesn't seem to matter though as I'm fairly certain he has given up. I guess I might give up on me too if I were him.

F5 ... yeah, still nothing ...